SO MANY ARMS

I
So many arms,
And so it's sad I fell in love with them,
I'm best hungry,
So keep my heart away from hopeless men,
The first one,
He stained my world and now I'm coloured him,
And now you,
That dying starlight coming back again.

I close my eyes and see a hundred greens,
The naive colours of the boy I loved at seventeen,
I cut my tongue out of my mouth- silence the screams,
Tie myself back to the bed to keep this water from a steam,

If I listen to C minor I'll cry crystal blue,
If I try too hard to write then the words I write are you,
You kicked the box under the gallows, I was sure my feet fell through,
Ran the blade over my veins like the turning of a screw,

I had an air-like love once and it tried to drown me,
All this flame and all this fire and it gathered all around me,
So I ran straight through the blaze,
And let the poison bleed through me,
Sacrificed a sinless past and it scarred my humanity,

(Chorus I:
They say life is for the living,
And your heart is for the giving,
But I gave too much of mine away,
Another blackened anniversary,
A child- abused and led astray,
So now I weep at night and sleep at day,
Endure the pain of mediocrity,
Or you should have asked for me to stay,
Instead you burnt my charm and marred the fey.)

II
This wild one,
I thought his power hot and feline,
And by moonlight,
We traced a jagged paper-line,
Erased you,
The red crackle faded over time,
Love's landscape,
The size was deified, sublimed,

And when I thought I had the antidote,
Stringless sex and growing thicker coats,
I looked back at all the notes I wrote,
And found the pull to you set me afloat,

If I start to pick rose petals I'll remember you,
Drove me crazy, said my name and for a while we flew,
The longing made me fight until the fever blew,
Now the other names of God just tell tales of you,

I chose to forego light once and respire in the dark,
I beckoned in the eagle and lay down with the larks,
I lamented in the rock as the deluge took the ark,
The wounded wolf with his bite as cruel as bark.

(Chorus II:
They say life is for the living,
And your heart is for the giving,
But I gave too much of mine away,
All these blackened anniversary,
A child- abused and led astray,
So now I weep at night and sleep at day,
Endure the pain of mediocrity,
You should have asked for me to stay,
Instead you burnt my charm and marred the fey.)

III
And the calm that comes between hate, desire and lust,
The cathartic tide- for in me you'll never trust.
Ad infinitum- and we thought we were so clever,
No grace left whatsoever,
To love harder- to endeavour,
Unrequited love means never.

(Chorus III:
They said life was for the living,
And my heart was for the giving,
But I gave too much of mine away,
And all these blackened anniversary,
A child- abused and led astray,
So I weep at night and sleep at day,
Endure the pains of my stupidities,
You should have asked for me to stay,
Instead you burnt my charm and marred the fey.)